Normally, whenever I find myself in a new environment, it takes me at least a day before I find myself doing something absurdly stupid and beyond reproach. In Hong Kong, it took me 1 hour to lock myself out of the apartment I was staying in... 1 hour!!
To paint the backdrop; I had opted out of the HK program's housing plan and found a room to rent from a relative at an extremely affordable rate. (It might put Bayview to shame, and Bayview feels like I'm getting paid to live there). After leaving the airport, I made my way to Kowloon (where the apartment was). Upon arrival, the apartment owner gave me a set of keys and explained that she was late to work, as a result of waiting for me to arrive, and had to rush out. I had a lot of stuff to unpack and prepare anyways, so I wished her well and saw her off.
After about an hour of unpacking, organizing and getting myself situated, I found myself in a huge sweat. Hong Kong's humidity is nothing to scoff at. The combination of a heat wave coupled with the saturated and wet humidity that pervades everything, made the feeling... icky? I took off almost every layer of clothing I had, picked up my Blackberry (I've realized having the BB next to me is more instinctual than actual necessity; the phone was not yet operable in HK and having it with me served absolutely no major purpose) and took a stroll outside in the community balcony.
After a few minutes and a lap around the floor, I made my way back to the apartment. I realized almost immediately the door was locked and I had no way in. (Ok, I confess, it was not an immediate realization. I did try like an idiot to somehow open the door for a good 5-10 minutes - sticking my hand into the mail delivery slot to somehow, maybe, reach the lock inside was definitely a low point).
And so, the (self imposed, because of my own stupidity) adventure began here:
I had exactly 6 items in my possession when I was locked out. (And when I say 6, I'm really, really stretching it) - a pair of sandals, basketball shorts, boxers, a tank top, glasses, and my Blackberry [which had not been setup to work in HK just yet]. I had no money on me at all.
9:38 pm Hong Kong local time
Once the dim prospect of getting inside had finally dawned on me, I tried to remain optimistic of the situation, something a friend had taught me to do. (Hello Le!). While I had no money or means of communicating with the apartment owner, I did have a functional Blackberry (minus the whole, slightly overrated phone call ability... just slightly). Even if the phone was working, I had left the owner's number on a piece of paper inside the apartment. When you couple this with the fact that I felt like it was inappropriate to call her since I had made her late for work already, contact with the owner did not seem like an acceptable solution.
Without a penny to my name and armed with nothing but a semi-functioning Blackberry, I decided to conquer the night. Thankfully, the area I was living in had a very robust nightlife, plus I had always wanted to see the city so I might as well make the most of the situation and check out the neighborhood...
- Right outside the front door of the apartment complex I was staying in... and yes, that bus was probably speeding.
- A billiard hall to the left and a outside dining cafe to the right... must drop by at another time, when I have more money than a hobo and look less like a hobo.
I also wanted to point out, I quickly noticed people starting to give me weird looks when I was holding up my phone and snapping pictures of a neighborhood that does not warrant much picture taking. I suppose it could have been worse. I could have had on less clothing at the time than the tank top and basketball shorts.
- This picture of a lone skyscraper seemed very symbolic of my destitution.
- At one point, I was trying to time it just right so that there would be a stream of lights on the freeway like you would normally see in professional photos. I failed.
- How do you know you are having a bad day? When a stray dog jogs past you, suddenly stops about 4 feet in front of you, lifts one leg and proceeds to take a piss practically on your shoes. I kid you not, and if I had not quickly taken a photo on the spot, I don't think I would have believed myself.
10:44 pm Hong Kong local time
- A park?! Have I found salvation?!
- Two simultaneous soccer games going on with subs and spectators watching... more and more promising as a potential savior...
- Hallelujah!! Basketball courts! With dozens of players playing/watching!
After more than an hour of drifting through the streets and market stalls of Kowloon, I happened upon a park with people playing basketball. Two things immediately cropped up in my mind. One, sandals be damned, I planned on playing. Two, the fact that the average height in the ballpark was significantly lower than the average height at an American park should negate any limited mobility issues as a result of having sandals and not basketball shoes.
I will be honest, it was pretty hard to get into a game cause I did not look like a serious baller wearing flip-flops. However, after some well-timed jokes and slight trash talking (de-emphasis on the word slight), I manage to get a spot in one of the games. In retrospect, it was probably not a good idea to talk trash at all since I had no idea where I was, who these people were and what was going on with the basketball game... but hey, desperate times call for desperate (and stupid) measures!
Proud to say, I proved a better player than they expected (although their expectations were pretty low), and I found myself enjoying a solid hour of basketball. I have to say, this was one of the most unique and random pick-up basketball games I have ever found myself in. I did not know what they were saying at times, I found myself instinctively yelling English comments, which no one really understood, and I am pretty sure they thought I was kind of crazy...
- All good things must come to an end. Once the park lights dimmed, people started to head out and I was once again cast into the ocean of desolation.
12:06 am Hong Kong local time (the next day, Friday the 13th... coincidence?!?!)
Once the basketball game ended, things started to go downhill fast. The streets were starting to thin out and any hopes of finding amusing and diverting activities faded with the passing minutes. I even had to take a $hit at this point.
- I happen to find, perhaps the only one in existence, a restroom without toilet paper in the stalls.
- The lone toilet paper dispensary stood at the end of all the stalls... Who the F*** designed this place?! Don't even ask how I have comments on all of this.
1:35 am Hong Kong local time
After these basketball and bodily function excursions, I returned to the apartment complex. I was slightly disappointed, although not too surprised, to learn that no one had returned home yet. I left a note on the door and indicated I would once again return in 3-4 hours. Round 2 of the Hong Kong walk-about started. With the dead of night squarely upon the city, the streets were near-empty and the lights of the metropolis got darker and darker. It got noticeably more difficult to find the impulse to take pictures.
- If I was less tired, I would have come up with a witty metaphor/proverb about crossing two separate bridges to arrive at nothing...
- This was a beautiful temple-like structure I found in a park that stood right in front of several towering skyscrapers... Hey, I've used that line somewhere before...
- This picture does not do this building justice. It seriously looked like it had two light-sabers flanking the front of the building. (Ahhh, delete Star Wars nerd moment!)
- I was somewhat amused by this sign on the road in front of a side-walk. In the States, you naturally learn to look left and right before you cross the streets, but I suppose they have the advice, literally, spelled out on the sidewalk just in case you never learned that lesson here. I wonder if they did it cause of past liability issues? Or simply because of altruistic reasons? If so, why not in the States? Do we not care or presume that people that fail to look left and right should get run over? (Ahhh, delete inappropriate comment moment!)
4:14 am Hong Kong local time
I returned to the apartment complex, yet again, after several hours of walking about the neighborhood. This time, I was surprised to not see anyone home. I had done the math in my head. Since the owner was late for work, she should have been back by now, but she wasn't. I started running through the possible scenarios in my head of why she was not back: maybe the commute was longer than I had guessed, or, worst case scenario, she was working overtime.
Having grown somewhat tired of the walking, I checked in with the apartment front office to see if there was some way I can get into the apartment despite not having my name associated with the formal lease. (Yes, I probably should have done this 6 hours ago... but hindsight is always 20/20). They flat out told me they do not keep spare keys and that there was nothing they could do. I have to say, I found that response suspicious but, I accepted it as a cultural idiosyncrasy, updated my note on the door, and went about Round 3 of neighborhood exploration bonanza... (even my sarcasm sounds labored!)
- I walked pretty far and came across this strange "Whampoa" place... It looked like it was an amusement park... in the middle of the streets?
- It even had a map of the place posted on a pole by the entrance...The place just looked weird.
6:10 am Hong Kong local time
I returned back to the apartment to (surprisingly and not surprisingly) find no one home. At this point, I was immensely tired, slightly hungry, extremely thirsty and even a little grumpy. To kind of put the cherry on top of all of this...
- the sun had begun to rise... I have walked until dawn apparently.
Too tired to continue with the street by street exploration, I found myself in a stairwell resting... A little bit later, I took the following video, aptly named "Prelude to Insanity" with the video-camera on my Blackberry (boy has it been useful for the night! Yet also useless in the most important regard...)
- Prelude or actual arrival?
8:00 am Hong Kong local time
One picture speaks a thousand words:
- I will see those 1,000 words and raise you a "F*** Me"
I did not get back into the apartment until about 9 or 10 am local time. (13 hours about... coincidentally?!) I stopped checking and caring. I would post more about the aftermath of my first night in Hong Kong, but, I am haggard to put it simply. (This post took more time to write than I anticipated...)
My final concluding remark: My first night in Hong Kong was unforgettable and forgettable at the same time. Oxymoron alert.
